Colemantology

Believe in your stupid self

How To Play The Guitar: Installment Five: Your First Gig

Playing guitar in front of people can be a difficult and stressful experience, especially when you’ve never played before. Try to think of the guitar as a scalpel, and the audience is your body. Just imagine that! Wow, huh?

Never doubt yourself. It’s best to just get out there and do it. Steve Vai once said: “I never booked a show in my life. I just promoted, and let the universe do the rest.”

Try to place an ad where it will be highly visible. Write the name of your band on small pieces of paper – hundreds of them. Tie the small pieces of paper around the legs of pigeons. Occasionally a child will snatch one of the pigeons out of the sky to eat it. After the child has devoured the carcass, he will give the legs to his parents as trophies. Now your show info will be right in front of their face!

For This Week’s Exercise: Unwind all of your strings and take them off of the guitar. Hold the guitar in your hands, but don’t play it. Just think about how the guitar is like you, now. Think about all the people in your life who have robbed you of your strings. You used to sound so beautiful, but now…

Look at the guitar

In your hands

Where did the music go?

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